This is my third trip to Montreal since September 28th – lucky me! First for to do Little Big Man Remix at Viva!, then to check out Spark & the Ephemera Festival, and now to visit Bobby while he teaches at NTS and have a couple of meetings myself. We are lucky enough to stay at Linda & Herve’s beautiful 2-storey apartment overlooking Mount Royal. Of course, I didn’t take any photographs until I got on the train to head home. But train rides are good for reflecting. For the last few days I’ve walking up the mountain each day, thinking about next moves. I always have so many ideas bubbling on the back burners that I need a little fresh air to really tap into what is important for me to explore right now. And the issue of control keeps coming up. My desire to control. The depression that results when I feel that I’m “out of control”. And what does control mean emotionally, physically and on a primary level? Travel can be very destabilizing, which in turn can help calibrate your sense of centre.  I’m not very far in my musing about control but I suspect that control is very closely linked to acceptance. We’ll see… we’ll see… I’ve got a lot more walking and writing to do…

Sometimes, the things you are most proud of accomplishing, become a mental block. In 2009, with the help of The Theatre Centre, The Music Gallery, many volunteers, and Laird MacDonald’s brilliant cake design – I was able to present THE BOUNCING BRIDE: What Is Down Must Go Up. (see video) However, once the impossible had been accomplished, I became convinced that I could sell the cake to festivals around the world! Well, this didn’t happen. After wrestling with the shame of losing so much money every month storing this cake, I have finally, FINALLY, come to the point where the cake must go! Clear out the clutter so I can focus on the projects at hand. So if you want wood… cathy@cathygordon.com